Partners sculpt each other to achieve their ideal selves: If successful, relationship goes well
Is that really Bob? You've seen him hundreds of mornings for the last 10 years at local coffee shops. Since he started dating Sara, he looks you in the eye -- and smiles. Sara takes every opportunity to let coffee shop cronies know that Bob is her guy and to gush about how funny he is. And he is. Who knew? Think of Sara like Michelangelo chipping away at a block of marble to release the ideal figure slumbering within. To the degree that the sculpting process has gone well, that she has helped mold Bob toward his ideal self, the relationship functions better and both partners are happier, according to new research. Conversely, a relationship can run into trouble when an individual emphasizes attributes that are peripheral to the core elements of what a partner ideally wishes to become.